REFLECTIONS ON FORMATIVE FEEDBACK
Tutor report: This was written with a follow up conversation
Response to formative feedback
In her feedback my tutor queried several points about my draft critical review. She was positive about my choice of topic, my understanding and my research which has allowed me to contextualise and make perceptive theses; however she points out that the breadth of my research and writing has prevented me from closely analysing my sources. She also pointed out that though my photographs are relevant I haven’t evaluated their potential to make change. I can see now as she says that my “critical engagement and analysis are hinted at rather than exemplified”.
My action plan for a reworking of the critical review
1. Reduce the breadth of my writing by “control and editing of sources”, this will enable me to:
- Give more in depth analysis
- Articulate my critical engagement, to describe how my sources support my view and have developed my argument and thesis.
- Describe how my research has led me to my end thesis – How I get to my ideas.
2. Provide more in-depth image analysis. The activists that I describe in my sources are visual activists so I need to articulate how they provoke a response through the lens, the response they provoke, as the audience is not passive.
My rework
I narrowed down the material that I used so that I could explore what remained in more depth. I have concentrated my review on fewer practitioners, but was able to use the other material that I’d previously used and read to retain my broader understanding of the issues. I have placed these references in my bibliography. I was then able to express how I developed my argument.
I also revisited the images that I’d included and included more background details on the images that I’d used and how they exemplified my thesis.
I can see that I have now formed a more detailed but also succent and cohesive essay which develops more effectively towards my conclusion.
Photography 2: Documentary 